Wednesday, 29 September 2010

Farewell




Hi.

I think this will be the last one about Zhi Qi.

Today is her funeral. Just came back. It took about 4 hours, but it feels like a very long time.

A lot of people were there. Many of her friends. Saw some from church and my neighbour was there, too. We prayed for her. Sang her songs. We chose "朋友". The lyrics were pretty true:

朋友 一生一起走
那些日子 不再有
一句话 一辈子
一生情 一杯酒
朋友 不曾孤单过
一声朋友 你会懂
还有伤 还有痛
还要走 还有我

It means something like this:
Friends go through life together
Those days, we won't have it anymore
A sentence, a lifetime,
A friendship, a cup of beer,
With friends we will never be lonely,
A word called "friend", you will understand,
There will be hurt, there will be pain
You have to go, though there's still me.

We also cheered for her. The Bestarian cheer. 'Who's the best?" "Ng Zhi Qi! Ng Zhi Qi! Ng Zhi Qi!". And then we did "tabir hormat". We gave a salute, scout style.

Her family put lots of pooh bear to accompany her. Her favourite. They put her school bag, her uniforms. We laid flowers. I put down a white rose. Then the van went around the neighbourhood until we reached the buses. Her brother and cousins pushing the van.

Then we went onto the buses, to go to the crematorium. On the way we passed through Sekolah Sri Bestari. We stopped for a bit. Quite the whole chool was standing outside the gate. Sigh. I think the majority of Form 4 was empty. All in the bus! I saw Pn.Rekha. She cried. See! Even when she used to scold Zhi Qi when she forgot to do her work.

The most painful part was watching her coffin go through the metal shutter. The smoke came out and I thought she was getting cremated in front of our eyes(what, that was a furnace?!). But then I realised it was just an effect. Along with the zingy lights. I hope she's getting transported to heaven. Cried badly. Her brother was very, very sad. Shouted her name.

Later, they showed us where they'll put her ashes. I hope she can truly rest in peace now.

On the way home the mood was a bit lighter I guess, because we cried our hearts out at the crematorium. Even the guys, too. Sometimes they act tough and tease you, but they just keep another side of them hidden. :)

Played with Weng Hock's iPhone 4 on the way home. I wanted to sleep but he tried to take a picture. (The dual camera is so nifty for camwhoring!). Saw a contact called "Leng Lui". Tried to see the picture but he tried to snatch my phone. Then, took a picture of Shao Yang and beat him up. Using an app.

On facebook a lot of people are putting pictures they took with Zhi Qi as an act of obeisance. I used to find her over-the-top when it comes to camwhoring but now I feel glad she took so many pictures.

Appreciate your loved ones!!!

Tuesday, 28 September 2010

Qi Qi




Good memories. :)

Quite some of the classmates were absent. Went to her house right after school. She was surrounded with pooh bears. And her friends. :)

Most of the people from our form came. It still feels a little unreal. It was OK until I visit her room. I've only been there once before. Lots of people in her room. We looked at her notes, her photos.

The promise for iPhone was still there. That paper. Everyone in our class signed it. Photos of her as a baby. Some nakey ones, too! It's hard not to cry when looking at those, because it's like being reminded of what we've lost.

I miss her. Someone said that it's odd people are saying that they miss her right after she passed. We miss her because she's gone, forever. Maybe she'll find a better place elsewhere. Everyone liked her. Now it's clear that that is because she also liked everyone.

There's a lot she hadn't experience, but she lived her life to the max. Jumping around. Laughing out loud. Belting out songs. Doing the most "sh" things.

Tomorrow, we'll be sending her off. I think majority of form 4 will be there. Her mum arranged transport too.



A picture is worth a thousand words. Zhi Qi has almost a thousand pictures on fb. Now there'll be a million words resonating long after she's gone. :)

Monday, 27 September 2010

R.I.P


This is dedicated to Ng Zhi Qi.

When someone tells you someone is dead, you hope they're joking. But death is not something that you can joke about.

We were all blithely clueless until Pn. Rosnah announced it. She said one of our students passed away. We'd never think it would be Zhi Qi because she was always so lively. And then she said, "from Form 4".

Before that Pn.Rekha approached Yih Wern and said there was bad news or something. We were asked to give a moment of silence. And we did of course. Words like this are hard to digest. Too big to fit in your head.

A handful of students went to the hospital. I think we'll visit her tomorrow, when she's brought back from the hospital (post-mortem). She slept and never woke up, but at least she didn't suffer.

I'll remember the fun times and this crazy, hyper and friendly girl.

Honestly, there's never such a thing as the right amount of grief. Don't cry and you're called cold-hearted, cry hard you're called too emotional. But, it's ok to be emotional when you're losing someone you're close with.

To remember something you've lost is hard, but denial isn't good. Xuan tried calling her handphone and got pissed when someone said she's gone.

I've never had a close friend pass away.

A lot of people cried. The sky is crying right now, too. :(

Life is fragile, but this makes it altogether more precious.


Miss you always.

Wednesday, 22 September 2010

Moon



Oh hi. :D

I don't ever remember Mooncake Festival being on a weekday. It feels odd, like nothing's happening at all.

Just woke up. Sigh. Those pics were from Form 1! I remember getting so excited to play lanterns. I want to celebrate Mooncake Festival. :(

What makes it complete? Tea, mooncakes, lanterns, candles, your family and the moon.

There was some argument today. Whole gang at Arts 2 "discussing". Conflicts are delicious to divulge into, but I won't want to be a the center of it. Confrontation is tiring.

Basically they were trying to make out who stole Nicole's phone, but I don't get why so many people were involved. Between Ding and Fikri, they say it's Fikri, and he's pretty scared because Nicole's boyfriend wants to come and get him and whatnot.

Actually the longer story was phone and money lost. Fikri returned phone and said Ding was also involved, and then other people were trying to make out who was the culprit. And then Fikri says he'll pay the money. But then others say that Fikri won't blame Ding for no reason.

Earlier sometime Xuan's money also got stolen, but Nakheel returned it because he didn't want Wesley to beat him up. :o But then someone else says that Nakheel just saw the money on someone's table so he picked it up meaning to give Tuan Haji.

Shits get stolen all the time, which is puzzling. It's not like their parents aren't rich and leave their kids indigent. Or, the point is not solely to obtain money but succeed in getting away with a crime? :/

Oh well. There's a secret language in our class, which sounds like Tamil no matter what language you're trying to speak.

And I have succeeded bring food for schol 3 days in a row now! Canteen food is uber heartbreaking useless. I think my tummy has gotten flatter! Hahaha. Brought cereals and yogurt and bluberries. I think I'll bring instant porridge thingy tomorrow. :D

Sunday, 19 September 2010

Wedding dinner






Wedding dinners are good for wearing clothes you don't usually get to wear. The dress I wore was taken out for the second time after youth camp. :D

But weddings are also very formal and sometimes tedious. Must find someone fun to sit next to! Brought my NDS, too.

During the part where they present the dishes, LIKE LOL, the whole place went black and disco lights jumped into action. Like a concert! There were even sticks of flames being carried around.

And Chinese wedding dinners, they all have shark fin soup and roasted pork. I don't want to eat the soup, and people make a big fuss out of it. They say it's fake but being under the same name irks me enough. It's stupid to chop up a small part of a living thing and leave them to rot and die. (google it!) Honestly, Chinese thinks that "exotic" animals are all delicacies.

Oh well. This was yesterday. Just came back from church. :D

Being in holiday for so long broke my momentum for studying. I'm feeling lazy, like a Snorlax.

Saturday, 18 September 2010

Kids


I almost forgot how cute they were.

Went to a relative's house. Someone is getting married, but I'm not sure who they are. Was lazy to go because it's very far.

Saw Yvonne there. Played musical chairs with the kids.

I seldom like kids. I don't have enough patience. But these were like angels!

The brother kept asking us to differentiate the twins. He could identify them everytime. And then he showed us little things that make them different, like Rachel's a little taller because she was born first but she's more shy, and that Ri-Ann's sleeve was a little different even though they were decked out in matching outfits.

Hahaha. I learned to differentiate them. :D

Sigh. They're such an embodiment of unbridled youth. I wonder when did the world started to have more blacks than white.

I don't like being inexplicably sad and having mood swings. And then I think stupid things, like about my dog dying and someone's dying because I couldn't reach their cellphone.

I'm not scared of dying myself, but I'm scared of other people dying.

YA KNOW?

Wednesday, 8 September 2010

Movies


Went out.

Holidays. When you have school, you yearn for holidays, when you have holidays, you yearn for school.

Planned of great things to achieve during holidays. Acquiring new skills and having unlimited time at my disposal. But really, all I did was flop around the house like a lazy snail. Being lazy is enjoyable, though.

Watched Step Up 3 at 1U. We had a hard time figuring out what movies to watched. Changed our minds more than 10 times between 4 movies. Good grief. Also got to a point where we were desperate enough to consider Cats and Dogs.

WHY ARE THERE NOT MORE GOOD MOVIES?! It's the holidays!

Step Up 3 was better than expected. Jason and I wanted to watch it again right after the movie ended, in 3D. Mostly because of the dance scene at the end.

By the time we walked from TGV to GSC cinema though, our mood dissipated. Wondered what else to watch. Queued for tickets and backed out, rode the elevator down and came back up. Pah.

Am still practising the high-pitch laugh. I cannot do Mei Yen's laugh but the high-pitched laugh might just be the thing. People at church laugh like that. Rachel and Nicholas. Like hyenas!

Laughing is nice, like coughing out sad things.

And then Natalie and Jason kept running away from me because I laughed too loud. I think a few people stared at us, but I couldn't be sure because when I'm laughing, my eyes are squinted.

I had my breakfast at Nippon Yataimura. SUSHI SUSHI OM NOM NOM NOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kani mayo! Ebi ten temaki! Inari sushi! HEAVEN!

They renovated it, looks a little like fast food joint. The sushi selection is not extensive, but delicious and cheap. When I put them into my mouth, the sushi seeped with sweet sauce, MMMMN it's like they're making love to my taste buds. Holy.

Food and music and love are amazing things in life. Like magic. YOU KNOW?

Life is actually pretty magical.
You want to stop time? Take a picture.
You want to teleport to somewhere else? Read a book.
You want to experience magic spells? Fall in love.

SIGH.

And then next there was Waffle World. It was even more delicious because it was free. Thanks to Jason. :)



And then went to Burger King. Didn't eat anything there. They just grabbed some fries.

AND NEXT! I FOUND RILAKKUMA PLUSHIES!

It is like seeing a river in the middle of a dessert!

You know, I spotted the brown coloured one first, which is Rilakkuma. It was on display. And then the salesgirl pointed out that they also have Korilakkuma. OMG. So glad she pointed that out, it was stashed in a corner.

Korilakkuma is the more girly one. PINK! Well I think I only need one Rilakkuma plushie, and it's this one. :))

You know how people worship actress and actors as idols? I never do that. I only like cute characters. 2 years ago I liked Hello Kitty and then last year I liked Stitch and now it's Rilakkuma. I dunno how long I'll stay faithful to Rilakkuma.

OH SIGH. Cute things are relaxing to look at.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO NATALIE!!!!! :DD

I like that facebook alerts you when there's birthdays. And then your wall will be filled with good-wishing.

Nice. But if I'm close to a person though, I don't bother that, I'll text them. :D

Eh, a lot of people are going somewhere. Natalie's going to Malacca, Sim Kuan to Shanghai, Mei Yen to Hong Kong.

CHANG CHANG CHANG CHANG!

Look at them worshipping Korilakkuma. I named it Bubu. In dedication to the blog name. Hehe.

The guys are all in black. ALL FIVE OF THEM.

Kula told me black is no colour at all. I only know that a colour is that colour because they reflect a certain wavelength or something.

Ah. Googled it. Black doesn't reflect any visible spectrum of light. And white reflects everything. And that a rainbow wheel will turn white when spinned. Kula told me this.

And white reflects heat. I like white cotton shirts.

I want to buy some pirated boxsets. You know, I used to look down on people who buy pirated dvds. I thought it corrupts the movie industry.

But really. I cannot stand forking out more than a hundred for boxsets anymore. I'M DONE. >:O Maybe for normal dvds. But I want boxsets. I don't want to wait for the TV to broadcast it.

And I used to hate the cinemas. But now, I kinda like it...

It's still a little too cold, a little too cramp and a little too dry in there, which reminds me of an airplane cabin. Airplanes make me sick. Had a 21 hour flight before, to US.

And a little too loud, too. But it's fun to watch with a bunch of people. The big ass screen. AND I WANT TO WATCH SOMETHING IN 3D.

Saturday, 4 September 2010

Movies


Watched Piranha today.

It's suprisingly 18+. Thought it was for violence but there was also a lot of gyrating bikini-clad girls involved. The movie was OK, entertaining enough. Gross, too.

Theng Loo went to bought the tickets initially, but he FAILED. The attendant asked how old he was 18+. He said yes. The attendant asked him to show his I.C. Terrible fail.

Theng Loo is tall, I think it has got to do with his poor command of English and the clothes he wore. Or maybe he isn't a convincing liar, which is a good thing. I'm not good at lying too. Serious. :)

And so Mei Yen lined up again for the tickets. She SUCCEEDED! Her age was not even questioned! Hahaha, I feel proud. Though I was dissapointed she forgot to buy it in 3D. -.-

Went to Cotton On too. Crazy cheap shits! OMG. Like forever 21 but at least half the price. Though, also half the choice.

Forever 21 is so guilty of marking up prices. They did it so conspiciously! Remember a while ago I bought a lot of headbands? They were only 7.90, and then now headbands got even more popular, it became 9. Same effing thing.

Bought a grey low cut sneaker and leopard print skirt at Cotton On. The sneaker was RM29. Good grief.

Chuckie got a furcut. He was a furball before and people said he look fat and I take that personally because dogs reflect their owners. But Chuckie is NOT FAT, OK! He's getting old now. He pants when I take him for walks. Awww.

Made Bernard take pics with me. There was talent time thing at Church yesterday. Sang true colours, prepared last minute. Victor can play by ear so well! It was also his birthday yesterday.


Well this blog post took pretty long. :/ But I like blogging. I like documenting my life, because I'm vain enough to be interested. I want to look back at being a teen and all, you know?

There's only less than 2 years left of high school now. Honestly, after so many years at SSB, it's my second home.

And now, waktu rehat! Enjoy the holidays! :D

Friday, 3 September 2010

Principal


Eh, today the principal talked to me.

Like she was interested to get to know me. Which surprised me, incredulously so. Mostly I only remember her criticizing the students, especially during the assembly. And so mostly when she approaches someone I assume it's to criticize.

She thought my mum ran Pappa Rich. That would be cool, but reality is that she was just eating there. And then talked about my parent's job bla bla bla.

Hahahaha. I don't know. She might not be so bad after all. Though some people automatically look intimidating. Bushy eyebrows, wide foreheads, down-turned mouth. Read somewhere that people with down-turned mouth are pessismistic and pretty hard to please. :o

Um. Her mouth did "shiver" when she talked, which looked a little like it's trying to contain anger and frustrations.

But I shall not have bias towards the principal from today onwards. Thougggh, it's disconcerting when school trips are disallowed and school rules are always getting tighter and tighter. And that the school fees, higher and higher. Bah.

Today there were interviews going on. For next year's prefect and librarian post. Some were dissapointed. The teachers are making Nicole to either breakup and be a head prefect or not breakup and be a normal prefect. Nicoles says she doesn't mind breaking up but she doesn't know how to say it to Shamsul because Shamsul asked Nicole not to leave this school to become head prefect.

IDK. Nicole is good with leading people. The current head prefect is in a relationship, too. Teachers said they don't want that for the next prefect. 0.0

But we shall always remember this quote:
"At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a friend, a child or a parent." Barbara Bush


Especially held true in this exam-oriented country. So next a friend asks you out when an exam is approaching, GO. :D To all Form 3s, don't worry about freaking PMR. They're abolishing it soon, right? No need for straight As, just get A in Maths, English and Science. But that's only required if you want Science 1. Get either 2 for Science 2. But don't do so bad you have to stay stuck in Arts 2. I hate getting no options.

Few people came, but it was pretty fun. Asked Wei Kien about stuff. If you're curious about guys you should just ask them. They're happy to brag and show. Um. Shocking that a few people had "done it".

I read somewhere on Tumblr that a man's penis is 3 times the length of their thumb, and I said that, but I suppose it isn't true because they got insulted that it was so short.

Hahahaha. Um. Well. Bye. :D

Wednesday, 1 September 2010

Chill


Holidays soon! Stayyyyying at home. Life's getting to a stagnant phase, though in a relaxing way.

I cannot understand when people tell me they're bored to be at home. One can feel cooped up, but I always find stuff to do.

Piano. Food. Dogs. Tumblr. Sewing. Drawing. Reading.

Hahahaha. Shall be looking forward to holidays.

Today there was performance, news broadcasting. Bleh. Gave us the notice like a week before. Lame! 3 Cekap won. I think they deserve it. My class got 3rd.

The people cheered hard when it came to our dancing part. Because Jin Fye really, really FLAUNTS it. Shakin' it all the way from SNSD to Dancing Queen and whatnot. Lots of people had Justin Bieber in their performance. Most. Woah.

I was the OLEY Reborn girl. Bought bubbles for that. Played with it later in class. Wei Kien thought me to blow huge-ass bubbles. You just have to be very, very patient. Dylan says his uncle can blow a bubble in a bubble.

Is there not a simple pleasure derived from blowing bubbles? Chuckie tries to eat the bubbles when I blow it.

Hmn. Independence Day. Was uneventful. Dunno. I like singing patriotic songs. TANGGAL 31, BULAN 8, 57, MERDEKA, MERDEKA!

Saw the clip of Tunku Abdul Rahman saying Merdeka 7 times during History & Geography Club. The seven times always boggle me. UGGGGHHHH. I tried to FREAKIN' GOOGLE IT. Google always have the answers. Not this time. :(

Damn. Why 7 times? Asked the teacher but they don't know if either. Adults are evasive when they do not know the answer. They say something obscure and generic, like "It's a tradition" or "It's a number they like.". Seriously? -.-

This is a little like a mindf***. Which is when you eff yourself real bad trying to figure out something.

Let me drop one in your way:

Violence is never the answer. Therefore, when someone ask you what is never the answer, you cannot say violence is never the answer because violence is never the answer.

Figure that out. Pfft.

Though I was in patriotic spirits, when I came home there was a video on facebook asking Chinese to get out of Malaysia if they don't like it because it's a Muslim country. In the Parliament. People shouting all over the place.

Pn.Rohaya says things really heat up during the debate but after that they forgot about it, like there's different identities in and out of the parliament.

I dunno. Racism is always prevalent in a multi-racial country. I confess this, I AM A RACIST. Sorry! But I won't reveal what I'm racist of, I'll keep that to myself.

Why I think racism happens is like this:
The Malays think this is exclusively their country. Heck, note MALAYsia.
The Chinese think they're building the economy and feel jealous of the privileges the Malays are getting.

I dunno. That's what I think. But it's impossible to sum up one race with a statement, because a race is made up of individuals and individuals are always different. Best to just say, "There's just one race, that is the Human Race!". Heard this from Vincent.

Well. I'll continue reading my book now. The Museum of Innocence. Was interesting at the beginning but now it's like the main character just whines over and over again and pines about his lost. Good grief, move on already.

Found this website, Goodreads. Good for finding reviews for books. I gave the lowest possible rating(1 star) for "The Last Song" and "Eat, Pray, Love". I am anguish for departing with more than 60 bucks for these 2 lousy books. These, are the books I hate most. If you would like to read them, I am pleased to give it to you.

The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks. He's famous for The Notebook movie. But never judge a book by it's movie. I read the Walk to Remember and I thought it was OK. Cliched, but I still enjoyed it.

The Last Song was just grossly horrible. Yee Shan liked it though. The main character was just one spoiled immature teen who is rude to her father. The characters were dull and unappealing. Eat, Pray, Love? The whole story was dull and unappealing.

It made me laugh though, when I saw this book called, "Drink, Play, Fuck" next to "Eat, Pray, Love" at Kinokuniya. I reckon the former would be much interesting than the letter.

Well some authors are character-driven, like My Sister's Keeper, some are plot-drive, like Twilight, some are prose-driven, like The Kite Runner. And if you find a book that is good in all three, you're in heaven.

If you are still reading this post I concede that you are an avid reader. Thank you for staying with me. Reading is very very important. YOU KNOW?!

I shall be a nerd and devour books. I shall expand my vocabulary immensely and fill my mind with new stories.

OK. BYE FFFFOR NOWWWW.